Vice-President Palin, Perjury Story Begins

Congratulations to Sarah Paldin, our next Vice-President. I hope everyone feels the energy I do from just looking at this woman. She has the openness and enthusiasm of youth,principles, and of being an outdoorsperson. It is also exciting for me because I started life in an Eskimo village in Anchorage though I was born in Massachusetts and raised in the South.
I want to start the story about why I have had my Second Amendment rights taken away from me and my guns seized by the Sheriff's Office. It began when Tasha and I came down from Virginia and found the house we are living in now. As soon as we saw it, we knew that was where we wanted to live. It was a block house painted yellow, 2500 square feet with a big two-car garage. The house had been built by the owner of an air-conditioning business on 80 acres. Unfortunately, he had gone into default, and for years the house had been abandoned. Locals used the pond for duck hunting, and I think I can see bullet holes on the exterior under the yellow paint. When we bought the house, it came with a little over eight acres that included a pond. We bought the house from a New York lawyer who had retired because of a stroke. His wife, a younger woman and a psychic seemed to run things. She did all the talking.
The two of them had bought our house when it was deserted and run down. They remodeled the interior, and the psychic hanged crystals in every room to bring peace.
The combined living room and dining area was quite large as well as the kitchen. We had been living in Tasha's low income house which she had bought for $30,000 when she was working for the City of Williamsburg, Virginia as a secretary making $7,000 a year. She had two children for whom she was getting child support for a total of $250 a month. Her house was, as you would expect, very thinly built and very small.
This block house in Florida was a palace in comparison. But we didn't know that the house had an ominous history to it. A couple had won a Power Ball lotto of around 100 million dollars. They decided to try to live as anonymously as possible and came to Florida from the North looking for a place to live. They had a young son whom they loved very much and were very afraid that he would be kidnapped and held for ransom.
They were an obsessive couple, particularly the husband. They had won the Power Ball lotto by devoting the wife's entire salary to lotto tickets and had painstakingly researched every technique for picking the winning number from the most obscure mysticism to quantum physics. After years of study and betting, it had finally paid off and paid off big. Now they were looking for a place to hide.