Three Black Pumas and One Bigfoot

Getting out in the field recently, I talked with an older gentleman who worked as a mechanic's helper repairing automobiles. The place he worked was in a very rural area so I asked him about seing black panthers. He had seen three in his life, all crossing roads in North Central Florida toward the Gulf of Mexico. He said one panther crossed the road at a tremendous speed. They were all-black. He had not seen or heard of a Bigfoot sighting.
  In addition, I was talking to a Bigfoot friend, Quiet Voice, in South Florida. He had received a sighting by a woman riding her horse in the jungle-woods. She saw a Bigfoot standing in the trail ahead of her. Her horse saw him too and began spinning, trying to avoid going any closer. After the first spin, the Bigfoot walked off the trail and disappeared into the jungle. Quiet Voice got into the area, but before he got to the place of the sighting, he was in water up to his chest. He turned back. You not only have to worry about quick mud, alligators, and cottonmouths in the water in South Florida, but now seventeen foot pythons. You wouldn't win against a python that long unless you could get to a fixed blade knife and start cutting before he wrapped you up. It's been an unusually rainy summer in Florida. The good news is that the lakes are beginning to fill back up and boats can get into them for fishing.
  I listened to a recording of a Bigfoot near A.P. Hill, Virginia walking through the woods at night. The tape recorder was left there unattended. This recording was at the Bigfoot Field Research Organization's website. You could clearly hear him tramping by. It was a huge noise and what struck me is that he never missed a beat. If you or I were walking through the woods at night, we would be faltering and stumbling. Not this Bigfoot. I couldn't help wondering if I would have the nerve to stay by that tape recorder even if I had an elephant gun. It was obvious that he owned the woods. If you or your friends have any sightings of either black pumas or Bigfoot, please call me at 352-359-0850. Thanks, Two-Guns.