Chapter 5 Bigfoot Comes For Barbeque

  Before  embarking upon this story, our house being foreclosed on weighs heavily on me. Bulletproof  has informed me that she had told the mortgage (the mortgage is in her name) agent that she could not afford the payments that have increased over time from about $1,000 to $1,500. The agent asked her if she could make $1,100 payments. Apparently, Bulletproof couldn't do that because she just told me that the bank is not accepting any payments. She is hoping for re-financing, and I noticed she had a letter from Fannie Mae. All the money has gone to veterinary expenses. What else do you do when you consider dogs part of the family? I am sure that Seal will take in all twenty dogs if necessary.  Bulletproof deals with the stress by running five and a half miles every day and then immediately biking the same route. Pretty good for a 65 year-old woman, aye? I deal with it by curling a fifty pound dumbbell and believing that I am going to get a video of Bigfoot that will make me a millionaire. You say that instead of antidepressants, I should be taking anti-pychotics? You may be right. But let's continue with my delusions.
  I have just read that a Bigfoot was caught in the act of taking some barbecue cooking in a man's grill on his  back deck. He simply strode away when seen. This took place in Perth, Ontario, on a fishing lake. The next day the Sasquatch was seen by two men who were fishing. The Bigfoot, himself, was watching two men who were canoeing by. They had their backs to them and didn't see him. The woods are becoming very crowded, and I believe it is the reason Florida - the fourth most populated state- is having so many encounters. There's little land left compared to Old Florida, and  humans and the wild people are bumping into each other. This sighting reminded me of one I collected years ago.I talked to a woman who lived in a mobile home  in the sand dunes north-west of High Springs, Florida.There was a nearby creek - Cow Creek- that was in an area of much vegetation that continued to major hammocks on the Gulf Coast. This was access for a Bigfoot. The woman had been cooking barbecue ( a very popular dish in the Deep South)  all day. There was a delicious odor emanating, and the windows were open. Her trailer home was up on stilts, and she could see around  easily. Late that afternoon, she looked out the kitchen window, and there was a huge, hairy face staring at her. She said the wildman had to be at least eight feet tall to look into her window. He simply walked away when discovered. The next time you go camping near some big woods, why don't you cook some fragrant barbeque and see who unexpectedly comes to dinner? In the 60s, it was Sidney Poitier. Now it could be Bigfoot.